Letter to Lily at 15 months

Dear Lily

I love you. You are the most amazing person I have ever known. I never knew it was possible to love this much until there was you.

Each day I am amazed by the things you do. You learn so fast and I love being your teacher. We lose minutes…. Hours… Days to playing and I love that I am also your best friend. I hope for that in the future too. So few parents are lucky enough to have that with their kids once they grow up but I will do my best to always be not only your mother but your friend too. Just remember that sometimes it will not seem as such, as there will be tough decisions you may not always like, but it’s only because I always want what’s best for you and to protect you from hurt and danger.

Being your mother has been easy. It’s a big learning curve, but you’ve so far not thrown us too many challenges. I’ve learnt a lot from you too. You’ve taught me to be more patient and shown me I’m a lot more patient then I realised. You’ve taught me to live in the moment and focus on now. That may have meant the house was always a mess & some things didn’t get done, but having most of your naps in my arms are precious moments I would not give up for a clean house. Having you as my world has changed my priorities. Career is not as important as family, although having the financial security to give you everything you need is important. It has meant considering my options and thinking outside the corporate square.

I am ready to expand our family of three now, missing those moments when you were growing inside of me or so new in this world and completely dependant. But at the same time, I am also glad these things take time as I love having so much time to enjoy just you. I know I will love your siblings just as much as I love you, but for now I am loving being Lily’s mum. It is by far the best role I’ve ever had and I hope when you are older, you will feel that I did it the best I could because there is nothing I wouldn’t give to make you happy.

I love you to the moon and back my darling girl.

Love mum

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2 thoughts on “Letter to Lily at 15 months

  1. this is nice. I hope lily gets to read this sometimes in the future, maybe when she is in that phase when girls resent their moms….

    but then I get a little disturbed when motherhood is seen as the best role a woman can have…and when you say you love your kids more than anything else in the world..it makes me despondent a bit. are we saying that the men are just being used to make babies and then their relevance fades…you love him just till the kids come and then all the love goes to them?

    as a man, single, I get the feeling that once the kids come, my wife would stop loving me and focus on the kids and I would struggle to get her attention… and if I complain, that will be all shades of wrong- I will be accused of being jealous of my kids!

    is this the reason why married men cheat? because they get starved of attention from the one person they need it from who have decided to focus on those cuties? do they feel redundant and their role shrunken to just being provider and protector?

    personally, I wouldn’t justify any reason for infidelity in marriage. but I think that the woman should love the husband more than anyone in the world and then the kids next. marriage is more than just to have kids- who would eventually leave someday, and in ideal settings, leave just the man and wife..

    and then maybe I just got it all wrong…

    Like

    • It’s an interesting take on motherhood and the changing dynamic of relationships once kids come but I suppose another way to look at it is you love your kids even before they are here. Unconditional from the start. With marriage, it’s a love that forms over time & a very different type of love. I feel the most love for my husband when I see how much he loves our daughter. You are right that the relationship between husband and wife needs to be prioritised too and like everything, these things take work with the changes over different stages of life, however raising a child is very rewarding for both partners. Thanks for the different perspective, raising great points & for visiting 🙂

      Like

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